How I Ended Up Smiling After my Smear Test (and 6 Things that Helped)
Let’s be honest: “pleasant” is not the word most of us would use to describe a smear test (or cervical screening, if you’re in your twenties and wondering what this is all about).
But the other day, I walked out of my test actually smiling.
Smiling.
No one was more surprised than me.
Because truthfully, I’ve hated smear tests for most of my adult life.
My Early Experiences with Smear Tests
My first cervical screening — sometime between age 18 and 21 — was awful.
The room felt sterile.
The speculum was cold, hard, and metallic.
The nurse was unsympathetic and frankly dismissive of my anxiety.
The experience left me feeling emotional and, honestly, a little violated.
(It helped that my boyfriend at the time took me out for tea and cake afterwards. Silver lining.)
Since then, I’ve had many smear tests.
Some tolerable, some… less so (including one in a glorified cupboard where nurses kept walking in mid-test 😬).
But this time?
Something was different… and dare I say it, pleasant.
So I want to share what helped.
Because if you dread cervical screenings, these tips might help you walk out feeling lighter, more empowered, and maybe even a little proud of yourself.
How to Prepare for a Smear Test: What Helped Me Feel Good
Here’s what made this experience so much more manageable — and even enjoyable — for me. Some things were in my control, some weren’t. But all of them helped:
BEFORE THE APPOINTMENT
1. Self-pleasure (yes, really!)
I know this might sound surprising, but hear me out.
Connecting with my body beforehand helped soften the nervous system and bring a loving, embodied energy to my cervix — instead of fear or tension.
That oxytocin boost made a huge difference in how I felt heading into the appointment. Rather than bracing for impact, I went in feeling tuned in and calm.
It was like giving my body a little reminder: You’re safe. You’re loved. This isn’t an attack.
2. Deep breathing
I practiced slow, conscious breathing before and during the test — not just for anxiety, but to relax my pelvic floor.
A relaxed body = a smoother, quicker exam.
My favourite technique? Box breathing (in for 4, hold for 4, out for 4, hold for 4). If I’d had a wobble, I was prepared to continue breathing gently afterwards to regulate again.
Highly recommend checking out @breathpod for guided breathwork tools.
AFTER THE APPOINTMENT
3. A planned treat
For me, that’s a matcha latte and cake from @kithandkin — one of my favourite local cafés with the loveliest team. I knew I’d be met with warm smiles and casual chats, which felt grounding and rewarding.
Even if it’s something small, knowing there’s a post-test treat coming helps reframe the whole experience.
4. Acupuncture
Later that day, I had a pre-booked session with my acupuncture angels, @fiona_swinburne and @lilja.katanka.
It gave me something to look forward to and offered extra nervous system support, whether I ended up needing it or not.
Spoiler: I mostly just had a deeply relaxing acu-nap.
5. Space in my diary
I gave myself permission to not rush back into work straight after.
Even though this time I felt great, knowing I had open space in my day helped me feel held, just in case emotions did come up or I needed rest.
Bonus: a kind, gentle nurse (and being ready to advocate)
This time, I was lucky to have a gentle, trauma-informed nurse. That made a big difference too.
But I also went in ready to advocate for myself — and if the vibe had been off, I’d have requested someone else or even done the test myself (which is an option in some cases).
So... Which of These Could Help You Most?
There’s no one-size-fits-all for cervical screenings, but knowing what helps you feel safe, grounded and supported can change everything.
And while we can’t control the room, the staff, or the tools — we can support our nervous systems, bodies and minds before and after.
I hope this helps you prepare in your own way, and maybe even smile when it’s all done.
Here’s to more pleasant (and empowering) smear tests — and clear results for all. 💗
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